The Gift of LOVE--a calendar!

I thought I would quickly share one of the gifts I made for Paul.  It was probably the cheapest gift I gave him (and easiest to actually make), but it's also my favorite!  As with any marriage, we have our ups and downs, and moments where it feels like we're just two roommates instead of totally in love eternal companions.  To help "bridge" the gap (hence the bridge theme...I thought all the lovey-dovey calendars were a bit much for our taste) and strengthen our marriage by making it a priority EVERY. SINGLE. DAY, I made a calendar of small things we can do daily to draw closer to each other.  I'm calling it our "love" calendar, although you could easily modify this for anyone, not just your spouse! 

The basic idea is this:

Step 1: Go get a cheap calendar from the dollar store. 

Step 2: Mark down all your special days--birthdays, anniversaries, even date nights.  Any day you might already be celebrating or spending ample time together, you don't *have* to write down anything additional for that day.  For example, Saturday nights are going to be our date nights this year, so I didn't write down anything else lovey-dovey for those days...it just wasn't necessary since we'll already be planning something fun. 

Step 3: Write down something small every day of the whole year to do together--it doesn't have to be anything huge (see below), and you can ABSOLUTELY reuse ideas more than once! (We ended up with about 50 ideas, which ended up being rotated every two months.)  In brainstorming ideas, I used a few online resources and mostly just thought of things that satisfy all the 5 "love languages," (since Paul and I have very different ones, we need to include a bit of everything!).  After brainstorming ideas that have to do with touch, service, gift-giving, quality time, and words of affirmation, I just tried to rotate them as reasonably as possible (the gift-giving and service only had so many variations, but we still do a little of each a few times a month).  I'll admit, since I'm a physical touch girl, we're doing a lot of that. ;)  Also, in rotating things I had to make a few modifications--like only putting "pay each other a sincere compliment in public" on a day when I knew we would be together in public, or changing what we were "sharing" about each time so that the same conversations didn't keep happening over and over again.  So, moral of the story--modify to be realistic to your family schedules, tastes, and lifestyle! 

Step 4: Post it somewhere you will both see it every day, and make it happen!  That's IT!  This would be fun to put together as a date night activity--gettting your spouse in on the brainstorming is always a plus! 

If you are stumped or stuck or just plain lazy (like *I* am, no judgment!), I'm including my list of marriage-strengthening ideas below.  You will see a few repeats--that's because, like I said, there are only so many acts of service or compliments you can do/say.  But I'm pretty pleased with the end result, anyway.  So far, 2012 has been treating us awfully nicely.  ;)

If you come up with your own ideas for friendship or parent-child relationships, though, let me know!  :)  I could always use more inspiration from YOU. 

53 Daily Ways to Strengthen Marriage:

1.      share a French kiss (or other "special" kiss that works for you)

2.      find something free in your day that you can give to each other (flower, rock, etc.). be prepared to explain why you chose that item, though!

3.      stare into each other’s eyes for two minutes, no looking away!

4.      do one chore your spouse normally does today

5.      share what makes you feel loved

6.      share an extra-long hug before parting ways today

7.      write each other a poem today and share it over dinner tonight (doesn't have to be a serious or publishable one, even a cute little couplet or limmerick will do!)

8.      husband’s choice!

9.      give each other 3-minute back massages

10.  make a small, free or cheap gift for each other today (card, collage of things you've found in your day, a special meal, something practical, etc.)

11.  play with or brush each other’s hair today

12.  leave each other something special on the computer (note, picture, video, slideshow, etc.)

13.  give each other 2-minute scalp massages

14.  make coupon books for this week (3 things you'd like your spouse to do for you), and spend the rest of the week doing those things!

15.  wife’s choice!

16.  share an extra-long hug when you meet tonight

17.  write each other a sincere love note today

18.  make dinner together tonight (weekends, or a night you will actually be able to do this)

19.  pick out a book to read together--and read a chapter each night until you've finished!

20.  play footsie as you eat dinner tonight

21.  dance to your special song tonight

22.  pay each other sincere compliments in private today

23.  work tonight to do a small random act of kindness for someone else

24.  shower or bathe together

25.  share where you see your life together in five years

26.  Share a toast to each other over dinner tonight

27.  hold hands tonight while doing something you ordinarily do

28.  do one chore your spouse normally does today

29.  plant something together in honor of your love for each other, and take turns nourishing it (call it your love cactus, or love fern, or love chia pet, or whatever!)

30.  cuddle closely before sleeping tonight

31.  do something to promote healthy living together (work out together, share an extra healthy meal/snack/dessert, stretch together, go for a walk, etc.)

32.  heart attack each other today!

33.  share a random fact about you

34.  give each other 3-minute foot rubs

35.  Send each other spicy/romantic texts/emails today

36.  make(or buy) a special treat to share tonight

37.  kiss “x” number of times today (especially good for special anniversaries, or dates, etc.)

38.   play LDS spin the bottle (or just any question/conversation starting game, getting to know each other better) over dinner tonight

39.  help shorten each other’s to-do lists tonight!

40.  share a secret tonight

41.  give each other 2-minute hand massages

42.  create goofy pet names for each other and use them ALL day today

43.  talk “very closely” about your day and try not to kiss

44.  share a special touch today—anything goes

45.  give each other 5-minute massages…anywhere goes

46.  start a “service tag” that lasts all week

47.  do a crossword, Sudoku, or other puzzle together

48.  buy something small for your sweetheart today ($2 or less)

49.  give each other 3-minute neck rubs

50.  use dry erase markers to write little love notes on each other’s bathroom mirrors

51.  share a 30 second kiss today

52.  list 5 things you’d like to do together over the next week and focus this week on making your lists happen!

53.  pay each other compliments in front of others today

Have fun drawing closer to your spouse!