So this is Christmas...

We survived the first year without Paul. Barely (it just wouldn't be Christmas without a good, solid family fight, right?) but we did it. Here are some of my favorite pictures:

But that's not really why I'm posting today. I really only post anything anymore when I have something important to say, and today that something is gratitude. I'm so grateful to my Father in Heaven for the calm, insightful, reverent spirit I've had within myself since Paul's passing--He has been teaching me a lot these last few months and comforting me through even the hardest nights. I'm grateful that this experience has brought me closer to Him. I'm grateful that even though I haven't felt Paul with me directly, I've been inspired to feel his influence in my life in many ways and to also feel the Lord's Spirit take over in a few instances where I needed Him most. (Even just over Christmas!) Even in my flawed state, when tempers flare or the loneliness is overwhelming, He does not leave me forsaken. I'm just very grateful.

I'm grateful to have seen my brother yesterday. I cried when I saw him on the screen in court, I cried when I heard him talking and realized how grown-up he is now (he IS 25, when did that happen?), and I cried the whole way home. He's in prison, and has been for quite some time--he missed our wedding and Paul's funeral, and his own son being born, and a host of other major events, and it's really reaching him. He talks differently now. He has some focus for the long-term, rough road ahead and for the first time seems ready to take some responsibility for himself. For the first time in a LONG time (a decade and then some) I have *hope* for my little brother. I actually want him in my life and believe I can help support him in some way as he transitions (eventually, he's not out yet) back into the real world. I am so grateful.

My niece is getting baptized tomorrow, along with two of her stepbrothers. My sister, who for her whole adolescence and most of her adulthood has been ambivalent at best about the gospel, has been going to church with her little family since Paul passed away. They're going to be sunbeam teachers. The kids are getting baptized. Cerene and Casey are working towards being sealed. They are adopting in a few months. I hoped for these things for her for a long time, but I can't believe the peace and joy that have come when they are finally happening! I am so grateful.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not all smiles. The holidays really were hard and every day I miss Paul more, not less. I cry almost every day, the ache is so much stronger than I'd ever imagined. I am sad, and angry, and jealous of others in a very intense way I'm not proud of.

But I just have also felt so blessed lately to be a witness to so many miracles, and I know there are more to come. I'm definitely sticking around for as long as I'm given, to see what they are! And I just felt like I should share that with you today. People, and life, can be so full of contradictions. But it doesn't make the good things any less true. Even with all the hard things I'd rather not pass through, and even though I'm all those "bad" (or, more truthfully, hard) feelings, I am also so very, very blessed. God is good.

I hope your Christmas was at *least* as blessed as mine was. 

Clothespin Wreath

This was another fun Pinterest find--special thanks to Craftiness is Not Optional for the inspiration!  You really should check out their tutorial HERE.  Since I made a few modifications to the "how," I'll add a basic step-by-step...but really do take a look at theirs, too, and decide for yourself how you want to go about it!

1. Buy your materials--clothespins (I used 40), an embroidery hoop, hot glue gun and glue, and green paint.  Red ribbon optional.

2. Paint your clothespins green (see the link above for great painting tips!)

3.  This is where I diverged a little from the tute above.  I didn't feel like shaping a hanger or threading clothespins and beads, so I just bought an embroidery hoop for a couple of bucks (a small one, maybe 8 inches?) and hot glued the clothespins right onto it after painting it green, too.  I lined up everything by gluing the metal claspy part of the clothespin onto the hoop.  I also did 8 sets of five, so I tried to line them up across from each other and halfway around the hoop (in halves, then fourths, then eighths, then halfway through that and two on either side) to make sure they were more evenly spaced.  It worked out pretty nicely.

4. Add a pretty bow and you're done!  The nice thing about embroidery hoops is that they have a sort of built-in hole, which I used as the top and it made hanging SO EASY.  I recommend it!

Looks great all by itself, but it looks even better filled with all your Christmas cards from friends and family!

Clothespins: $0.99 for 40.
Embroidery Hoop: $3.59
Paint: $0.47
Hot glue and ribbon: from stash.
TOTAL COST: $5.05

Can't beat that!  It would be even cheaper if you were recycling/repurposing these materials from around the house or other projects!  I love that I now have a fun way to display all those holiday cards every year...and it motivates me to actually send some out in the snail mail, too!

4-sided (4-season) decor!

I finally got around to making my 4-season stackables!  I loved this idea from the moment I saw it because (a) I like cute, handmade things, and (b) I live in an apartment so I don't have the space to store a lot of cute things.  :)  I haven't put any vinyl lettering (I'm gonna go with white eventually) on them yet, because I'm indecisive about fonts and words and such right now, but they look pretty awesome as-is.  So maybe they won't get any vinyl at ALL 'til next year?  :)

Anywho, I found a few variations of this idea via Pinterest (check out HERE, HERE, HERE, and HERE)...because some of those links give tutorials or even an option to buy for various holidays, I won't go into TOO much detail here.  But there is a general idea/to-do list below the pictures if you're interested in the short version.  :)

Basically I bought some wood--I went with 4x4s from Home Depot (get the cheap wood, it's not for building--I got an 8 foot length cut down for about $9 total!  I loved that they would cut them for me, although I know most people get much thinner wood...also, I liked that I could make them HUGE and the 12x12 paper I bought would cover 3 sets...great for Christmas presents!  Cut your wood (whatever sizes you want, I used 6", 8", and 10" blocks) and sand all edges down as smoothly as you like.  

Paint or stain the blocks in the color of your choosing.  

Purchase and cut to size 3 scrapbook papers (I really recommend 12"x12", you can always use the leftover scraps for future art/decor that matches) for EACH holiday you pick.  I liked the white trim around the blocks to make it more uniform so I cut the paper 1/2" shorter than the length of each wood piece.  I chose Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Valentine's Day papers, although if you want to do other holidays--St. Pat's, Easter, 4th of July, back-to-school time even--go for it!  :)  

Mod Podge your papers on, under AND over the paper, one side at a time with at least 2 hours of drying time between each side.  TIP: Unless you're going to also seal it with some sort of sealer, I HIGHLY recommend storing/stacking these with a thin sheet of wax paper between each block.  At least for the first year of use.  Mod Podge can be temperamental, especially if you store it in a box in the garage/shed with weather changes, and you don't want to have to pry them apart and possibly tear your paper!  

Finally, if you so desire, add vinyl lettering to each side.  Enjoy!

Putting the CHRIST back in Christmas...

So, I know *I* personally struggle with the holiday season.  For lots of reasons.  I'm almost always sick (though never as bad as I have been this year), and the seasonal depression kicks in (some years worse than others, this year is a doozy), and it brings up a lot of sad memories, and I am always worried about finding/making the "perfect" presents for others (on almost no money, of course) and decorating and making an appearance to all sorts of parties and trying to somehow recreate the perfect moments of childhood Christmases...while simultaneously knowing IT AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN.  I don't know what I'm expecting, but it just never quite lives up to it.  And the story of CHRIST, the whole reason for celebrating, admittedly gets lost in the shuffle.  Or, when it's dusted off and brought out to unwrap again, it just doesn't touch me like it should because I'm already way over Christmas in my own heart (like 2 days after we decorate) and moving on to greener pastures...like 2013.  Or my birthday.  (Yes, I have over 3 months 'til my birthday but it is ALWAYS ON MY MIND this time of year.)  Or even the ever-increasing to-do list and the mundane.

I've seen (from more creative and spiritual minds than my own) some great ideas on how to really enjoy the holiday season and put the focus back on this miraculous story of the birth of our Savior, even if you're sans children like us (because, really, isn't Christmas most fun for the children?):

1. Get the shopping and decorating done BEFORE December 1st.  A few friends do this and they say it makes the holidays much more bearable, as you can focus on the fun stuff.  I am hoping to be on top of things enough next year to try it out for myself.  :)

2. When you do your decorating/Christmas countdowns/family traditions, focus on the Nativity and the very TRUE story of Christ.  Have the 12 or 25 days of Christmas be about scriptures and ornaments rather than candy or superficial/commercialized Christmas traditions (although those have their place in families for sure!).  Start a nativity collection, or at least make a nice display of the one(s) you have so that they are the focus.  Keep your Christmas CD songs about the gift of the Savior and the things surrounding His life and ministry, and less about reindeer and Santa Clause and presents and snow.  (Although some of those are the most fun and kids especially need those too!)

3. Serve, serve, serve others.  Nothing brings families closer than coming together to meet the needs of another family.  When we focus on the gifts we can give the Savior, or our fellow men in His name, we will feel the Spirit more and enjoy sweet moments that will fill us more than candy in our stockings ever could.

Good ideas.  All of them.  But I am looking for MORE.  More unique, or more specific, more meaningful to ME, or just...MORE.  I know I'm awfully demanding and ungrateful in saying this, but I just want more.  I literally need to marinate myself in these things or it just won't reach me this time of year.  And I know, from conversations I've had with friends and family alike, that I'm not alone.  So what do YOU do--what traditions do you have, or want to have--in your family that help make the holidays more...bearable, at worst, and enjoyable at best?  I really wanna know!

Christmas Card

I'm struggling to find that "perfect" design for my Christmas cards this year. 

Traditional?  Multiphoto?  Details of the year added?  I can't make up my mind.  Here are the ones I've designed so far...

But none of them are "it." I wish I could take elements of all of them and make them all blend together into the perfect card. I also wish I had more time to devote to this problem. :) Unfortunately, there are REAL problems and REAL life yet to tackle and this may end up getting pushed back until New Year's like it has the last few years.  But while I figure it all out, here's a QP 5"x7" that you could use for your Christmas cards if you wanna.  :)

Download this .png 5"x7" QP HERE.  You're welcome.  :)

My Sharpie Mugs :)

I've seen the idea of writing on oven-safe dishes with Sharpie and baking it to make it permanent ALL OVER PINTEREST.  (Draw what you want, bake at 350 for 30 minutes so it "sets" and you're good to go.)  So I thought I'd try my hand at it this weekend, since my apple cider kick left me wanting LOTS more mugs around the house.

I also saw THIS POST (tutorial included) via Pinterest and had wanted to try it out.  So I killed two birds with one stone and did the design on the Dollar Tree mugs.

I'm in love.  :)

SO FUN.  I even like the semi-unfinished look with white spots in the middle.  And it's cheaper than our favorite paint-your-own pottery place (we already have a couple dozen Sharpies so really it was just a $1/piece for the mugs or plates from the dollar store)...I want to make two more in different color schemes so we have a "full set" to share when people come over.  :)  And I think a personalized dish set is suddenly very affordable as a Christmas gift/stocking stuffer!

The darker pink did come out of the oven a little different (faded purple-y) than the rest, not sure why...maybe because it was a knock-off brand of Sharpie?  Dunno.  But it's still very pretty and floral in the end, which is what I was going for.

NOTE: These are NOT dishwasher safe after you've baked them--most people in the comments say that at least half your design will come off in the dishwasher or even with a brillo pad or something like it.  So gentle hand-wash only. You may even want to write that on the bottom of your dishes.  :)

Happy crafting!

10 Things Tuesday: Christmas recycled crafts!

I'm going to take a break from searching this week, and instead review some of the crafts we've found that work great for the Holidays!  Maybe in the middle of all your crazy parties and family get-togethers you and your kiddos can sit down and make a few!

10. Fake chimney, from old cardboard boxes!

 9. Snowglobes, from old glass jars!

 8. Ornaments, from just about EVERYTHING--lightbulbs, sticks, and more.

 7. Magazine trees!

 6. Pinecone trees!

OR stick trees!

 5. I know this is a little late, but a cute advent calendar from a cookie sheet and magnetized bottle caps!

 4. For your holiday dinners, how about a fork placeholder?

 3.  Check out this wreath, made from a hanger-circle and strips of plastic shopping bags!

 2.  This isn't *necessarily* a holiday craft, but if you make this soda can lantern with holiday patterns, it could be!

 1.  Seashell angel ornaments!

BONUS IDEAS!
*Again, not exactly a holiday craft, but if you filled this plastic bottle with water and holiday trinkets (tinsel, mini ornaments, or old Christmas earrings), it could be!

 * Christmas candles, made from old tin cans!

 * Christmas gifts for others--use safety can openers to open the BOTTOMS, then fill the cleaned-out cans with goodies and decorate for your friends!

 * Cardboard tube candles!

 * What about this Christmas choir?  Some craft paper, TP tubes, old baby socks, and twine make this little choir the cutest carolers around!

Happy {holiday} {green} crafting!  And Merry Christmas!

Christmas 2010, Take 4 (and final)

Here are some pics from our fourth and final Christmas!

I spent 5 hours baking SOOOOO many cookies!  (Yeah, not so good for that New Year's Resolution of being healthy, I know...but, to be honest, I hadn't eaten much in the way of holiday goodies this year, and I hadn't baked ANYTHING myself, so...it was time. I'll start once these cookies are all gone.  At the very least, our Primary kids will score big on Sunday. :)



Homemade Oreos



 

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip

Chocolate crinkle cookies---my new favorite holiday goodie!

Gingerbread men...gonna have to tweak this recipe a bit, I wasn't too satisfied with the taste.

Of course, sugar cookies.

We decorated the sugar cookies while listening to Christmas music!

Emilie and Ian taking it seriously.  :)

Paul's artistic nature came out.

Proud of his Christmas tree. :)

Em showing off her goods. :)

My cookies...

"It's a shark, giving a ride to a ballerina." ~Ian

We opened stockings and presents.

Small stocking stuffers...

Modeling her scarf.

SOOO happy with the Yoshi pants. :)

Pretty perfect body pillow.  :)

Ian's odds and ends...

Ian found some Star Trek comics for Paul, which made him automatically awesome.

And he painted a picture for me.  :)

Paul got me a small, lightweight sewing machine, which is perfect since I don't sew much but I wanted some for small projects and such.  :)

Still sooo happy. :)

And then we watched Stalking Santa, a Darland family favorite.

SO sad the holidays are now officially over and we'll have to put up our tree and decorations for another 11 months!