Telemarketers

I started work recently as a telemarketer, selling identity theft protection for Citibank credit card holders. I struggle with it, as I am not exactly the pushy type (at least not over the phone to strangers about a product I couldn't afford myself), but last week I did make 5 sales. Not too awful, but there's still definitely room for improvement.



But the most amazing thing has been the learning experience of talking to all sorts of people across the country...even though I'm forced to stick to a script, the people on the other line aren't, and I have come across a wide range of individuals. And I'll tell you what I've learned:


(1) Strangers show you the true side of people, the best and the worst. I have met some fun and good-natured people, who listened to my schpiel and were very polite if they turned me down, and some who laughed it off kindly and when I apologized for all the phone calls they've been getting from the company they have understandingly consoled me, "Ma'am, I know how it is, everybody's gotta eat, everybody's gotta work." I've even had a marriage proposal from a pentagenarian. :) But then I've also run into lame people who were mean and rude and awful. Swearing isn't the worst of it, I can handle that. It's the sarcasm, the blaming you for things you have no control over, the refusal to let you say what you HAVE to say in order to get through your script and hang up.

(2) Adults are just hormone-induced, aged children. They still have the same petty cliques and grudges, fights and backstabbing, and if you treat one differently than another they whine and complain about how unfair their lives are. Especially, frankly, telemarketers. I mean, if you're in your middle-aged years and haven't been able to do better than a telemarketing job, well...

(3) I have a great family. Strange as that may seem, considering this is lessons I've learned as a telemarketer, I must admit that I have come across some very miserable (and miserable to be around) people whose families make mine look like the Brady Brunch...and that's no small feat! But all of our problems aside, I know that there's a lot of love and concern and sacrifice, especially from my parents. I'm so glad that most of us expect more from our lives than some of these people have come to hope for.

(4) I am SO in the right major for me, and I get to graduate with a degree. Therefore, I have no real qualms about not being the world's best telemarketer. And I secretly laugh at the people I work with because I am going places while they are not. Not very Christ-like, I know, but it's how it is.

(5) I am a public transportation aficionado. Not having a car has relieved me of any and all fear of buses, even here in Lafayette. Although, not gonna lie, I still want a car. :) More on that thought later...

Chicago, Chicago, That Toddlin' Town, That Toddlin' Town...

So, I'm pretty much in love with Chicago. :) Paul and I got to go there on the 5th-7th of July, to hang with his family and see some of the museums and to get away from the drama and sadness around here for a while. Here are some pics of the occasion! I seriously want to live here someday...

Here's Paul and me on a strip of land between the Shedd Aquarium and the Adler Planetarium...with the gorgeous view of the Chicago skyline in the background! We had a nice lunch there on the lawn, with the most annoying seagulls ever known to man scavengering around for our leftovers. :)

We got to see some really neat shows at the Planetarium...I've always loved learning about space and planets and stars and such, so this was a real treat!

Here we are at the Aquarium, me, Paul, and his lil' sister Emilie. I got to see lots of creepy looking fish, like the one pictured below...and a dolphin show, and some beluga whales. Not as cool as the ones in Japanese dramas, but this aquarium still rocked my socks. :)

I thought this was kinda cool, this whole parade of worlds in front of the museums that reminded me of those silly hogs and frogs here in Lafayette. But still cool...

Navy Pier, a place I could spend days at...we got to ride the Ferris Wheel there, which has always been a sort of fantasy of mine, and play Putt-Putt and eat out. So here are the pics from all of that. :)

A very pretty place, you know how I love fountains of any kind. :)

What can I say, I have an electric personality! :)

This is one of the oldest buildings in Chicago, and it made me laugh to see it stuck right in the middle of downtown, with all the skyscrapers and such. It's like someone took an old church out in the middle of a small Greek town and then built a huge city all around it.

I love horses. Too bad we didn't get to ride any on this trip...maybe next time!

Paul, looking for his old high school from the top of the Sears' Tower. You can't be that high off the ground and not feel a little of the romance of the place, especially not after watching "Sleepless in Seattle" a few dozen times before the trip! :)

If you love big buildings and sunny beaches, Chicago's a great place...and what a view, from the 103rd floor!

*Whew!* We were pretty glad to be going home after a whirlwind handful of days walking around everywhere...and best of all, we got to ride the train! I've decided that trains are a great, cheap way to travel. I'm a fan.

Well, that's our trip in a nutshell, kiddos. If you haven't been to Chicago, you need to go. There's so much to see there, and we didn't even begin to scratch the surface...we didnt' even BEGIN to begin. :) And it was an amazingly fun and relaxing distraction from all the goings-on here in the real world. Good times, friends, good times.

The Best of Times, and the Worst of Times

Looks like my sister found Caleb a good home with a couple of really nice LDS teachers. And he opened an eye today. Huzzah for Caleb! Sad day for Cerene. He leaves us tomorrow...but he will always be in our hearts.

for Cerene

From God's Arms, to my arms, to yours

Words and music by Michael McLean

With so many wrong decisions in my past,

I'm not quite sure if I can ever hope to trust my judgement anymore.

But lately I've been thinking, 'cause it's all I've had to do.

And in my heart I feel that I should give this child to you.

(Chorus) And maybe you can tell your baby, when you love him so,

that he's been loved before;

By someone who delivered your son

From God's arms, to my arms, to yours.

If you choose to tell him, and if he wants to know,

How the one who gave him life could bear to let him go;

Just tell him there were sleepless nights;

I prayed and paced the floors

And knew the only peace I'd find

is if this child was yours.

(Chorus) Now I know that you don't have to do this,

But could you kiss him once for me

The first time that he ties his shoes,

or falls and skins his knee?

And could you hold him twice as long

when he makes his mistakes,

And tell him that he's not alone,

sometimes that's all it takes.

I know how much he'll ache.

This may not be the answer for another girl like me;

But I'm not on a soapbox saying how we all should be.

I'm just trusting in my feelings and I'm trusting God above,

And I'm trusting you can give this baby Both his mothers' love. (Chorus)

Bilateral Schizencephaly, one open lip & one closed, with partial agenesis of the corpus callosum

A mouthful, I know. But that's what's plaguing my new nephew Caleb right now, and I have had a lot of questions lately about what exactly it is and how it's going to affect him in the future. So I thought I'd put up the medical terminology and give you a few links to start out on, and if you still want to learn more you can google 'til your fingers drop like we all have been doing for the last week. :)

http://www.emedicine.com/radio/topic622.htm

http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/schizencephaly/schizencephaly.htm

http://www.emedicine.com/radio/topic193.htm

http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/agenesis/agenesis.htm

But you know what? Despite the grim picture painted by both these websites and the doctors, Caleb is doing a lot better than we expected already and he's got a lot of promise in him. So do not despair! There is hope. Where there is life, there is always hope.

But a few prayers never hurt anyone...

I want to live here!

http://www.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/meast/06/25/duibai.tower/index.html?iref=mpstoryview

So who wants to give me the millions of dollars I'll need for rent? :)

Hahaha...funny, coming from the girl with $12 to her name. ;)

72 hours, 5 hours of sleep, and totally worth it...

My little sister went into labor on Friday and had a baby late Saturday night (11:28). The baby boy is relatively healthy so far, although he is in NICU for some problems breathing (people gotta do that) and for weak reflexes...but he's getting stronger and I know it's thanks to a lot of prayers and faith from lots of family and friends. We may not get to keep this boy around for long, for an adoption is in consideration, so it's impossibly hard not to get too attached. But a new baby boy is always nothing short of a miracle.

No one should look this good in labor.

Mom's touch...

I think we hit a record of most non-related visitors during labor...

And here he is, a brand new baby boy!

A very nice nurse helped her out during the homerun stretch...

So very tired, after such a long and hard labor...but you did it!

Like I said, Paul, you're gonna have to wait a few more years!

Breathe! Relax! It's over! :)

Pupusas

In honor of the whole Latino culture thing, Paul is in charge of Ward Lunch this Sunday and he is teaching me how to make pupusas. Pupusas are a Salvadoran dish, kinda like a corn pancake stuffed with cheese, peppers, beans, or meat, and topped with tomato sauce and this stuff called curtido, which is a slightly fermented cabbage/onion/carrot mix with vinegar and spices. Sounds strange, but everyone on any website I've found for 'em says they are to die for. I'm excited to try 'em. So that's what I'm doing today as I wait to go volunteer again...shaping out the pupusas under Paul's tutorage. Yay for culture!

No hablo espanol!!!

So, this week I began my volunteer work at Lafayette Adult Resource Academy, currently (and hopefully permanently) located in Washington Elementary School. I now tutor the beginning ESL class on Tuesday and Thursday evenings. I LOVED the training portion, which lasted two full mornings and in which I got a first-class tour of the place, stories from the director's life, and most importantly some practice in tutoring. Last night was my first full 3-hour class period, though, and I was pretty wiped out. Too many worksheets, my eyes felt heavy by the end of it all. We'll see, though--another volunteer there said that it's something new and different every week. And the teacher is a really nice, open lady. So I'm still excited. And there are always conversation labs I could volunteer in if I need to switch it up.

I should probably explain that my personal philosophy is that when in an ESL class, you don't have to know the native language of the students. They are there to hear, speak, read, write, and learn English. I'm not suggesting that we devalue or exclude their native language and culture--quite the opposite, in fact. But if they are there to learn English, the best way is by immersion, as with any foreign language. One of my personal pet peeves is when I tell someone that I'm interested in teaching ESL someday and they say, "Oh, you speak Spanish?" or "Oh, what language do you speak?" My answer to the latter is always an abrupt, "English!" The thing is, of course, Spanish is the second most used language in the United States, and around here is "the" language to speak. Looking back on things, it would've been the most useful language to study in high school, while Japanese would've been the most fun and personally rewarding. As it is, I studied French. (Et je l'ai appris bien, merci beaucoup!) Go figure. And then American Sign Language. But I digress...

I have a boyfriend who's fluent in the Spanish language thanks to a mission in Vancouver, but I don't speak a lick of it. I can read a fair amount because it's so similar to French in some ways, but to hear it I may as well be listening to Turkish. (Which, by the way, everyone in the evening class is from Mexico or Guatemala except one girl, from Turkey. The Asian group, sad day, meets in the morning classes...) So while I still maintain that if I were teaching the class I'd structure it so that English was the focus, I'm realizing that as a tutor I can't understand some of their questions and they can't understand some of my answers. Some students are right with the teacher as they all fill out those blasted worksheets, but others are lost and without a model to follow they don't know what to do. So I need to learn some Spanish. I don't care enough to study it fully--a decision I will probably someday regret--but I certainly do need to get some of the basics down.

Note: The reason I don't care enough about it is that there are several places in the country, Lafayette included, where Spanish is NOT the major minority language spoken. Polish, Dutch, Korean, Chinese, Japanese, French, and several of the middle-eastern countries have their own well-established communities, and often in urban areas you'll have all of them mixed together in a single ESL class. Spanish will not help you then. I am going to Japan in two years to teach English in a middle school there for a year. Do you think that Spanish will matter there? Not really. My point is that there are other cultures out there that matter, too, and students from many places of the world, and so to be an effective ESL teacher you either have to know every major language in the world (but I'm no John Henry Jorgenson), or you have to know English and use it wisely. I'm stuck with the latter. The only reason I really care now is that Paul speaks it, and we want our children to speak it, so I'm going to have to learn it eventually, anyway...after I get some Japanese down, of course. :)

But for the purposes of this volunteer experience, here are the first ten Spanish phrases I will learn:

1. Me llamo Celeste. My name is Celeste.


2. No hablo espanol. I don't speak Spanish.


3. No entiendo. I don't understand.


4. Como te llamas? What is your name?


5. De donde eres? Where are you from?


6. Donde esta (el bano)? Where is (the bathroom)?


7. No me gusta. I don't like it.


8. Creo que si/no. I think so/I don't think so.


9. Que tengas suerte! Good luck!


10. Una lengua nunca es suficiente. One language is never enough.

What do you do when you have nothing else to do?

Here's our answer. We found this ridiculously huge plastic bag in Amanda's room and had a little fun with it last night...

Top 10 things to do with a bag this big:

(10) Start up our own Star Labs.

(9) A really big prop for ribbon-dancing gymnasts...

(8) An umbrella for escorting large crowds to their classes on campus.


(7) A wind tunnel, or some sort of haunted house tunnel, at least...

(6) A ridiculously large trash bag that would take us the entire summer to fill up...


(5) A cocoon, for all of us beautiful butterflies out there...

(4) A slip-'n'-slide.

(3) A giant baggie...but where's the fridge large enough to hold us? Ziploc, you're goin' DOWN!

(2) An elementary school P.E. parachute!

(1) A huge plastic teepee for pow-wows.

WHITES WILL VOTE FOR MCCAIN

(Disclaimer: This post is a satyrical response to news articles and stories I've seen entitled "Latinos will vote for Obama" and "What Will the Black Women of Lafayette Vote?" and "Why Didn't More Women Vote for Hillary?")

There's no doubt about it--with Hillary off the democratic ticket, women are now at a loss as to who will gain their vote. With no one sharing their double-X's, shouting "Solidarity, Sister!" and making women a target of shovenistic photos and comments across the country, thereby gaining the support of women who have faced similar bouts of discrimination in their personal lives, well, clearly they are incapable of now choosing a candidate based on merit and common interests and ideas about where they want to see this country go. (For but one example of this discrimination, scroll down to the photo at the end.) With men at the forefront of the election yet again, voters are hungry for a president that looks just like them. It looks like this presidential race of the 21st century will come down to just that--race.

And Whites will vote for McCain, with all other minorities voting for Obama.

Shout hoorays, ye minority women, for you no longer have to think about who you're going to support in the race. No more cameras will be pushed in your faces and asking you about your vote, because the question is no longer raised. It is obvious that while you may have been torn between Obama and Clinton in the beginning, for both reflect different aspects of your identity, your vote has now been all but decided for you.

Sing huzzahs, ye Latinos, for although your beloved Clinton is out of the race, heaven knows none of you could agree with McCain--I mean, c'mon, he's WHITE. Obviously he could never have your best interests at heart and you could never vote for anyone who hasn't walked a mile in your oppressed shoes.

Rejoice, ye Whites, for although by all projections of the government you will by the year 2050 be a minority in this country, perhaps your White Man will relieve you of the threat now, change the rush of the tide while he has a chance. No one has asked you yet who you are going to vote for in this historic election, because, frankly, no one cares. Everyone already knows--if you're not Black, why would you vote for Obama? And if you're not a woman, Hillary couldn't possibly be a serious thought in your mind. No one bothers to do studies about how you will vote, because you white men have been voting for hundreds of years and you've always voted for White men--why question the obvious?

No, the issues do not matter. The platforms of both parties are so similar in nearly every respect, with only a few key points that have sharpened into a heated debate (the results of which will influence the daily lives of millions of Americans--especially the too-often-neglected poor--and the relations we have with other nations in this global economy), and who needs to listen to all those words? Ideas? Please. Clearly, an educated votership is beyond any expectations for you. Don't worry about it, dear voter. Look in the mirror. Then pick the candidate with the same skin as you. We all know that's all you can see in this election, anyway, and all that we can talk about...you may as well be public about it.

Celeste Darland is a freelance writer and an avid Obama supporter, and the views and opinions of this article in no way reflect the views of Blogspot.com or any of its affiliates. No animals were harmed in the making of this article, except that I did eat meat for breakfast as I wrote this...sorry, Charissa.